Gift giving for a loved one on holidays, birthdays and other celebrations can be hard to navigate, but when you add in the extra layer of what is appropriate for a loved one living with dementia, that can be even more challenging.
The good news is it doesn’t need to be. We’ve put together a simple list of gift ideas that can help celebrate your loved one at any stage of dementia.
A thoughtful present can bring comfort and joy, elicit cherished memories, and give your loved one a great activity to enjoy.
Keeping gift-giving simple
The best way to get started when considering an appropriate gift for someone living with dementia is to consider what you know about the person, their life story and their interests, before the dementia diagnosis.
Often gift giving can be as simple as a memento of their life, such as a photo of a favourite vehicle, sport or pet. A familiar blanket or pair of slippers may also help to trigger memories, whilst providing comfort and encouraging conversation with visitors.
For example, if your loved one has always enjoyed spending time in the garden, a small pot plant for someone in the earlier stages of dementia, or an artificial version of their favourite plant that doesn’t require maintenance may be a nice gift for those in a more advanced dementia stage. Often seeing or smelling a favourite plant can trigger a raft of positive memories, as well as helping them feel connected with nature.
Evoking memories with musical gifts
If your loved one enjoys music, they might enjoy a recording associated with important periods of their life, such as classical music for a ballerina, or the greatest hits from a favourite musician or band can be a wonderful way of bringing memories to the fore.
When choosing a musical gift, how it is played can make all the difference. Keep it simple, enjoyable and easy to use, so the experience feels comforting. A hand-cranked music box may be suitable for a loved one who still has good coordination, or a CD or record that can be played by a carer may be more fitting.
Your loved one’s abilities will also change cognitively and physically as dementia progresses, so gifts should suit what they can comfortably do right now, not what they were once able to do.
Gifts for someone living in a specialist dementia care facility in Auckland
If your loved one is living in specialist dementia care, it’s important to consider the space available in their room, and what that facility allows. A large or complicated item that could be difficult to store or use wouldn’t be a good idea, whereas a practical gift that can be enjoyed independently, or with another person like a carer might feel more appropriate.
Check with your facility’s healthcare team in the first instance. They are perfectly placed to offer great tips on what to buy your loved one as they will know what currently interests them, as well as offer advice on what may present a hazard or safety concern.
As a quick guide, sharp or pointy items, gifts made of glass or that can easily break when dropped, or those that can create a choking hazard should be avoided.
The Beach House Facility Manager, Diana Ciobanu says the best gifts are safe, simple and fun.
“Over time, I have seen many gifts, but here are some that stood out and appeared to bring so much joy. It wasn’t the most expensive ones, it was the ones that brought back wonderful memories.”
“If you can spend some time to share these gifts with your loved one, no matter what stage of dementia they are at, these are going to bring them joy in the moment – and that is priceless.”
Gift ideas for someone with dementia
Memory can remain strongly connected to moments of familiarity, photo albums, memorabilia and gifts connected to their past are a great place to start.
| If they like | Get them |
| Decorating | A picture or family photo in a plastic frame or digital photo frame, a memory box, a cozy blanket or a lightly-scented pillow |
| Sports | A jersey, scarf or beanie from their favourite sports team |
| Cooking or Baking | Their favourite meal, cake or slice (check first with the care team if your loved one is living in an assisted care facility or on a restricted diet), or a cook book that contains large food pictures |
| Photography | Create a photo book and select photos of your loved ones most enjoyable moments in their life. When visiting, sit with them and go through the photo book together. Photos could include family members, pets, boats, or cars. |
| Noise cancelling headphones | Bring noise cancelling headphones with you when visiting, play their favourite music or song. Watch their faces light up! |
| Music, theatre | A CD or music box with a favourite song, soundtrack or band |
| Colouring book and pens or pencils | Ensure the colouring book is age appropriate. Cars, floral, or animals. |
| Gardening | An artificial plant that doesn’t require maintenance, or a small pot plant |
| Soft toys | People living with dementia can’t resist a good cuddle with a soft toy. |
| Box of chocolates | Yes, this may sound simple. But when you visit your loved one, residents love nothing more than hearing “I got us some chocolates” – key word being ‘us’. It’s creating a moment for you to enjoy together. |
| Reading | A large print book or audio book |
Gift for the person, not the diagnosis
There is no universal gift for someone with dementia. Dementia affects people differently, and your loved one’s preferences are likely to change over time.
If in doubt, talk to the other people in your loved one’s life who know them well. Family, whānau and their specialist care staff can often provide valuable insight into current interests, abilities and preferences.
Be mindful that your gift may trigger memories in a different way than you may expect, so we encourage you to not be disheartened if gifts aren’t received in the way in which they were intended. Remember to always be patient, kind and empathetic to the situation. It may take a few attempts or a re-introduction of the gift at a different time for the person to accept the gift.